By Fr John Quang SVD
As my 20th anniversary to priesthood is approaching this year, I am tempted to look back and see for myself what I have achieved, or not achieved, and what are my hopes and dreams for my future.
During those 20 years, I have been through a number of ministries: parish, formation, social communications, with migrant workers, provincial counsellor … but in short, and honestly, I see myself more as failure than success! Mea culpa! Mea Culpa. It is no one’s fault but mine and mine alone.
I love that penitential prayer, especially this bit that I try to pray every single day. “I have sinned in what I fail to do.” Sin is not only in what I have committed but also in the good things that I could have done but I failed to do so. Mea Culpa again!
I am not trying to depreciate myself here. There are limited achievements too, of course, but at the end of the day, I can only pray as Jesus taught, “when you may have done all the things having been commanded you, say, ‘we are unworthy servants, we have done that which we are bound to do’ (Lk 17:10)”.
For a future with conviction.
What do I hope or dream for my future? My hope is that my conviction in what I believe and live for will continue to be renewed, enlivened and strengthened. That conviction in living out the gospel values, and as a result of this effort, I try to have positive impacts on others around me. Evangelising is too big a word for me! Leave it to the experts!
Through my various ministries, I’ve found that I spend lot of time worrying about formulating vision/mission statements. I remember we may even spend whole days arguing just about the wording of the statements. Honestly, after a year, I hardly remember those statements, mea culpa mea culpa! These are important as far as they help us to have a purpose and show us how to gear ourselves towards that achievement. They are a means, not an end in themselves.
No one dies for a statement. But people are willing to live and die for their conviction. Conviction drives our life. Jesus and the early disciples did not die for statements, but they lived and died for their conviction in God’s coming kingdom, and its values.
Great missionaries, like the apostle Paul, didn’t charge into mission with a mission/vision statement. Paul armed himself only with the gospel of Christ which was his conviction.
For an open mind.
A full mind is a closed mind. I am often greedy to fill up my mind with knowledge and what I want to know. The more we know the more we realise what we know is just a drop of water in ocean. Jesus didn’t ask us to have a full mind, but an open mind, so that He can fill himself in.
In a popular post-Easter story, we see the effect of encountering the Risen Christ: “He opened their minds to understand the scriptures.” (Lk 24:25). Prior to this encounter, their minds were closed and full of their own plans. They only got the message when their minds were open to Christ.
That is the beauty of the Easter Effect. The course of history is turned around when we open ourselves to God and let His Spirit open our mind.
Summarily, we have already entered into the 21st century with lots of uncertainties but also filled with much hope and anticipation. What does it mean for us to be religious in this exciting, yet uncertain time? Try to figure it out with an open mind.
Leadership is indispensable, no leader is perfect but as Jesus said to Peter, ‘so when you have repented and returned to me, strengthen your brothers’ (Lk 22:32). My hope and prayer is that SVD leadership will strengthen our conviction too.
IMAGE: Shutterstock.
