1 Kings 19:9a, 11-13a
Roman 9:1-5
Mathew 14:22-33
There have been few times in my life where Jesus’ invitation to join Him on the water like Peter, have really taken me by surprise to the point of running away. These were very difficult moments when fear, doubt and confusion would take control of my life at that moment in time.
I still could remember vividly an experience I had in the interior of Ghana, West Africa, where I ministered from 1998 – 2000 amongst the Asante tribal peoples.
One day a verbal invitation came from some traditional animists, to come and share with them about the life and teachings of Jesus the Christ. From the story I heard they had seriously wanted to know about Him. But to get to their village I had to travel some ten to fifteen kilometres on dirt track. Guess what, I had not been there and there was no GPS to guide me. I was simply told by my superior, “Go!” Like in today’s Gospel Jesus simply says to Peter , “Come”!
It meant I had to spend a night in this African bush. For those of you who have been on an African Safari tour, the scenery is majestic, alluring and mysterious. Yet dangerous animals are always lurking around the next untamed bush. Going to that African village, my final destination meant I had to take a crash course in the local language and culture and hope to God things would be okay. It also meant crossing a massive lake to get to the villagers. A lake meant I had to find a canoe big enough to carry my off-road motorbike.
Only God knows what I experienced on that journey.
For hours it rained and rained. The downpour was like a massive waterfall from the heavens and it was getting dark. I was on my motor-bike and it gave up on me. I had no choice but to walk in the sheer darkness for many hours in thick mud. Sometimes I would be on my knees to find my way. At this point I had lost all my sense of direction. My fear of snakes, wildcats, crocodiles, lions was so tangible that I could even hear my heart thumping hard like crazy! I was feeling exhausted, afraid and slowly losing hope. The initial excitement of spreading the Good News was not exciting any more. I was literally drowning in my own lack of faith. Of course I prayed but the fear was so overwhelmingly powerful that it kept paralysing me.
Then I saw a light in the distance.
At first I was scared by it but then as I grew closer, I found that the light was a simple campfire glowing from a humble thatched hut. Soaking wet and tired I knocked on the door. “Please let me in” The door opened and there was an old hunched back African man in his 80’s standing before me.
With my limitations in the local language I begged him to please spare me a dry space in his hut. He smiled and simply said in Ghanian, “Akwaaba” which means “WELCOME”. “Ahhh,,,!”, , I heaved a sigh of great relief and gratitude to this old African man, disguised as God.
Part two of my story of what happened at the lake and the question, “Did I actually reach my destination?” Well that’s for another day. Watch this space!But I learnt a few hard lessons that day.
The space between where Jesus stood and our point of departure is a sacred space that could be both completely terrifying and unbelievably exciting. But it must also be a space where we must trust in the providence of God. Without trusting in God, fear could easily engulf the soul to the point of drowning into the depths of the lake forever.
Fear can also manifest itself in so many strange ways. For instance, the disciples in the boat didn’t recognise the figure coming towards them as their friend Jesus. The light I saw in the distance was meant to be a sign of hope but because I was filled with fear I panicked and got scared. My perception got distorted by my own fear of snakes and wild creatures and I thought that light was a ghost.
Richard Rohr, a Franciscan priest says, “The greatest enemy of faith is not doubt; the greatest enemy of faith is fear. Most of the world is controlled by fear, petty and big. Petty fears control people; great fears control nations. We could feed all the people in this world if we would stop building arms, but we are afraid”.
Yet the sight of Jesus walking towards Peter while he was drowning was a sign of God’s calming, healing, ordering presence for all those in the chaotic waters of life.
Fr Asaeli Raass SVD
Friday, 8 August 2014